Dictionary

To Cleanse (aka Why I Am Not Suitable For “Expedition Robinson”)

[Verb; ~ Pronunciation: /too/ /klenz/]

  • Definition: Attempting to get your cortisol-production under control and symbolically starting the new year with a new beginning by abstaining from solid foods for two days. Result: I felt cleansed. And hungry. And kind of cranky.
“Human behaviour flows from three main sources: desire, emotion and knowledge”
– Plato –

Watch the video. You don’t have to understand what they say, just know this: twenty (semi-)famous Dutch people voluntarily get dropped on an uninhabited island where they have to make camp and survive for, say, a month. No food is supplied, they have to forage everything themselves.

There’s more to the show than just that, but that’s the set-up and all you need to know for now.

Thing is: the people on the show are Hungry. With a capital H. Let’s face it: there are only so many bananas you can eat without wanting to die.

Before this year started, I had decided to do a two day cleanse, meaning I’d consume nothing but juices, tea and (so it appeared), bouillon. Why? Because I’ve gained a little weight after a few periods of intense stress, and apparently cortisol (the stress-hormone) is produced in your belly, where it will happily sit and wait to be demolished, because it knows that process takes a very long time.

I had read somewhere that fasting for at least two days would help your body reset its cortisol production and on top of that I thought it was a good idea to start off the new year this way; before starting my new, healthy diet I’d not eat anything solid for two days. Start with a clean slate, if you will.

I had imagined it would be very difficult, seeing as I can get very cranky if I’m late with any meal. But as it happened, all went well. The first day I found myself not even thinking of food or wanting to tear open a bar of chocolate.

Until after dinner.

I got so hungry, I developed a headache and tried to cure this by drinking more water and eventually bouillon. That helped a bit. But after two days of consuming nothing but tea, freshly made fruit juices and, well, soup broth, I was relieved my cleansing was over!

I did feel healthier and lighter in a way, but I can’t imagine having to do this (or actually worse: practically not eat at all) for a full month! I remember watching an apple I was about to turn into juice and the longing I felt to rip its flesh apart with my teeth and chew and chew and chew.

But I resisted. Because I told myself I could eat anything I wanted, I just chose not to eat any solid food. I cleansed myself and I felt good. A little more so on the mental front (because I didn’t give in to temptation), but really good nonetheless.

This whole process made me more appreciative of food in general, health, and my super strong willpower. I can recommend it to anyone. Just make sure you do your homework and you cleanse in a healthy manner.

2017 has started, people, and I am ready for it! I hope you are, too.


How did you start the new year? Do you have a special way, too?
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4 thoughts on “To Cleanse (aka Why I Am Not Suitable For “Expedition Robinson”)

  1. The show with the Dutch people being dropped on an uninhabited island reminded me of all the people I now who were dropped on a rock, 93 million miles from the nearest source of warmth. Worse let, they arrived on the rock without clothing and were very small. If all that wasn’t bad enough, the rock was already inhabited by people, not all of whom were friendly. :)

    Liked by 1 person

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