“By three methods we may learn wisdom. First, by reflection, which is noblest. Second, by imitation, which is easiest. And third by experience, which is the bitterest” – Confucius
Seven days, seven newly acquired bits of wisdom. Here’s my list:
- Laughing out loud can stop irritation from evolving into a tantrum. Last Tuesday was my father’s last day at work before he retired. Me and my mum decided to decorate the house and so I was up on a chair, balancing myself while reaching above my head, over a giant wardrobe, to try and fasten the end of the decoration-line over a hook in the wall. I kept failing, had just about had it, and felt one of my infamous tantrums closing in on my otherwise rational brains, when my mother burst into laughter about the hilarity of the situation and all I could do was join in. Bye bye frustration, bye bye anger. Instead of bursting into full fury, I simply laughed it off and tried again (and succeeded).
- Some people don’t need closure, some people need tough love (and preferably a new collection of brain cells). I told this guy a few weeks ago I don’t want to reconnect and want to be left alone, and he said he wouldn’t bother me any more. But then he sent me an email last week explaining his behaviour by admitting he had fancied me since he first met me.
With the risk of repeating myself: I don’t need this crap! I closed that book and moved on (also, if you like someone, here’s a word of advice: don’t treat them like dirt. Usually that doesn’t make them like you back).
He hurt my feelings, and the first time he contacted me to reconnect our friendship I was ever so proud of myself I was mature about it, and completely honest in a nice way. But this time I told him what I really felt, more openly than ever, and explained to him how I don’t need him. Or another shot of drama.
Did I feel good about being harsh to him? No, although I honestly thought it would be more satisfying. But I didn’t see any other way to stop history from repeating. In the end, you have to choose what’s good for you. I tried it the nice way and that didn’t work, sometimes it’s necessary to edge things up to get that final closure.
- Don’t always take the bait or hold other people’s lives as a reference point to your own. This one is building on the previous point. You can talk about Oscar Wilde aaalll you want, but I am not falling for that. No contact means no contact, period. It also doesn’t upset me any more when other people talk about things they’ve done that I’ve always said I wanted to do (like visit a famous person’s grave). I don’t care. This is my life, I am living it my way, and whatever I want to do, visit, explore, I will. I don’t care if you were there first.
Comparing your own life to someone else’s is comparing apples to oranges. You never win, because there isn’t an equal fight going on. Move on and stop wondering if your life is interesting enough. Stop stressing out about being afraid to miss out on something. You’ll get there in the end and your life is just as valuable as anyone else’s. Think of it like this: you’re both colouring the same picture, but you’re using different colours. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
- I would be perfect to star in the next Snickers-commercial. I turn into one mega drama-queen-b*tch when I’m hungry! It’s like my body and mind get taken hostage by an alien, and this process/feeling is only reversed when I get something to eat. When it happens I know I am being irrational due to lack of food, but I can’t stop being a snappy miscreant. If only I’d turn green as well, I’d be the female Hulk. For now I’ll settle as the Dutch Joan Collins:
- You can never have enough shoes. Or socks. Especially when your old shoes turn out to be not-so-waterproof anymore. The feeling of sudding around in your shoes, your toes all cold and near dying off, is one of the worst feelings in the world! Cold feet equals being cold all over, so best thing to do is get yourself some dry socks and water resistant shoes on as fast as possible. And then grab a blanket, a hot cup of tea, settle yourself on the sofa and watch a good TV show.
- This movement is called an “A-press”, NOT an “eight-press”. Nothing more to add. Just… I keep learning so much when doing body pump :p
- Everyone has a bad day now and then. It’s natural and it happens to us all. Some people have more bad days than others, but still. It’s okay to feel bad every now and then or have a day where nothing seems to go right. Just keep on breathing; like everything else in life bad times will pass. Don’t fret, just focus on tomorrow :)
That was my weekly list for this Sunday. What about your learning moments?